Happening July!

Thank GOD for Your amazing love for me even though I do not deserve it.
July was a happening month filled with lotsa work, church evenings & weekend trips.

Work: The few products which I'm handling had a increase in its volume due to several promotions going on. Thus I am pretty 'occupied' throughout rather than busying only between 8-20th of the mth.

Church: I am hype up for God and I am still excited for more! Now that I am attending classes...I will be in church for at least 4 times a week!! And starting Sept, if I get to be selected to join the Alpha course as a helper, it will be another evening added!~

Weekends: Happening as some might say. But I definitely need such "distractions/diversions of my mind" for the time being.

1st weekend - Diving trip @ Pulau Redang




2nd weekend - Celebrating mom's birthday @ DTE chalet having BBQ; went to Wild wild wet & BBQ-ing in the rain with some church friends.


3rd weekend - Cameron & KL trip with Mingmin & Sandy




4th weekend - NDP NE Show with Dad!
I love the fireworks!

Busy busy!

Just a status update to let everyone know that I have not died from crying over someone.

I had been very busy with work due to the 1 week absence. And I will be getting busier in the coming two months as I will be going for several trips!

But before those trips can come...I am looking forward to this weekend!

原來愛情那麼傷。。。

梁咏琪-原来爱情这么伤

我睁开眼睛,却感觉不到天亮
东西吃一半,莫名其妙哭一场
我忍住不想,时间变得更漫长
也与你有关,否则又开始胡思乱想

我日月无光,忙得不知所以然
找朋友交谈,其实全帮不上忙
以为会习惯,有你在才是习惯
你曾住在我心上,现在空了一个地方

原来爱情这么伤,比想象中还难
泪水总是不听话,幸福躲起来不声不响
太多道理太牵强,道理全是一样
说的时候很简单,爱上后却正巧打乱

只想变的坚强,强到能够去忘
无所谓悲伤,只要学会抵抗

原来爱情这么伤
原来爱情是这样,这样峰回路转
泪水明明流不干,瞎了眼还要再爱一趟
有一天终于打完,思念的一场战
回过头再看一看
原来爱情那么伤
下次还会不会这样

Rest in God...

I'm so glad that all these is finally over. The end of a very torturing week trying to block out all the tock tock tock chiang and being a runner & entertainer in the extreme heat for the whole week.

Both mentally & physically tired now...I pray that I will get total healing & restoration from God in the next two days before I start doing all of June's work to be completed in the coming week.

What should I do?

My mind is in a mess now and I am too tired to think rationally.

R.I.P. Grandma...

Psalm 73

When I read the above today, I realized how silly & little faith of me...

Thank God for Your presence and that You once again spoke to me. Thank You so much for picking me up when I fall down each and every time. Thank You for drying up my tears so I don't kill more trees with the boxes n boxes of tissues I use each day. Thank You for the friends whom You have put around me. And last of all, Thank You for dying on the cross for me.

I need a zapper...

This is to remove my memories as I find it so difficult and painful!

I still cry myself to sleep these days and what issit of use even with those creams or eye masks?

I had already kept myself very busy and what issit of use when my mind isn't in the activities I do?

I feel so frustrated that I just want to rip open my brains to take the part of you out.

Here comes June..

A month which I was looking forward to many things and now everything had just blacken out.

I wonder what God will bring in June and whatever He puts ahead for me, I know it's will be the best.

God is ♥

Ignore me in the previous post if it bothers you that I don't seem awake. I probably am not(at that point of time).

And yeah, it has only been a while and things are very much different now. Even though I may feel a little exhausted traveling home late at night as most of the time I run to church after work and weekends (Thank God for all the activities that He has arrange!). But I know that I have learn and gain so much during this period; that God will give me the strength I need and restore me to wholeness.

So many dumb things and grave mistakes I have done, for what I've called love. And so much so that the only thing I received now is just pain, hurt & heart brokenness. But why do I still do daily prayers for you...despite many people questioning me on why do I care, when you don't even care? Tsk! I don't even have an answer myself. And if I would to think...that is God's grace.

You may choose ignore me once again if I don't seem awake again.

But this is a phase which I must go through. I know Papa God is doing wonders and His transformetion will be great. =)

I miss you like crazy...

Even though it's been awhile and there had been many new things going on, like moving of office premises, I had been helping out very often at my church and my Lord has done alot of transformetion. But the following song still best describes my feelings now.



I used to call you my girl boy
I used to call you my friend
I used to call you the love
The love that I never had
When I think of you
I don't know what to do
When will I see you again

[Chorus:]
I miss you like crazy
Even More than words can say
I miss you like crazy
Every minute of every day
Girl Boy I'm so down when your love's not around
I miss you, miss you, miss you
I miss you like crazy
You are all that I want
You are all that I need
Can't you see how I feel
Can't you see that my pain's so real
When I think of you
I don't know what to do
When will I see you again

Sad

I found you to be special. But you are just like the others out there now, too conformed by this evil world...

God is ♥

There are higher heights, there are deeper seas.
Whatever You need to do, Lord do in me.

Irony?

Few of my closest friends are going through very rough patches too. And the thing is that I could advise them but I can't apply what I have said to them on my own self. Worst, I'm crying even more than ever! And will I be the first in the world, to cry myself to death?

So prayers have been answered for them, but what about mine? I'm not questioning Papa God and perhaps He had already answered my prayers and its just that I had not been listening.

Nevertheless, I'm still glad that I am able to help in my little own way.

HeartacheS...

The world around me is making me feel so very sad...

Deadly viruses is spreading around. The financial world is crashing down. Within a country, people with authorities are fighting among themselves. And there is a big percentage of broken marriages & divorces. Seriously, what is this world becoming to?

As for myself? What can I say? You were scared & I was scared too...But you held my hands! How can I ever forget that??? You bring the world & smiles to me but only to destroy it now...

Papa God, please help us...please help this world. I believe in You. I still believe that there is true love is this world and there is pureness in people's heart. Everybody may think that I'm naive. But I still want to believe...I want to cling on to this hope in You!

Grace...

Some ppl is really testing my patience. And the best thing of all is that I must love this enemy. Does this sentence sounds ironic or wrong or funny to you? But no...that wasn't my intention.

Matthew 5:44
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven.

I'm enjoying this walk with God every single second. Thank you, my dear Lord. =)

Truth...

No eye cream can take my sore puffy red eyes away but only God's mercy and grace...

Praise the Lord!

I have so much to say about today but I am locking it up in my heart for now.

The feeling is simply fantastic/great/wonderful/fill in anything good & I really do not want it to go away...

And right now, I'm just eager to find out/know/see what God has in store for me. =)

Memorable quotes...

I have always kept the following quote from the movie "Juno" bookmarked on my favorites. And this shall remain as one of the best...

Mac MacGuff(Dad) to Juno: Look, in my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person is still going to think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.

Proverbs 19:11

A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.

Lord, give me the ability to be slow to anger. Take away anything in me that refuses to let go of anger over things that have happened. Help me to not get angry over that I think are injustices or personal affronts. Help me instead to quickly overlook the things that make me upset and release all my anger to You. Replace anger in me with Your love and patience. Help me to be gracious to everyone I see and to be full of compassion in all situations. Help me to not retaliate with angry words that I will ultimately regret and that will grieve Your Holy Spirit. If anyone is angry at me or convicted me for any reason, whether justified or not, help me to always give a soft and gentle answer and forsake harsh words that stir up strife. I don't want anger in me to delay my wholeness and keep me from the destiny You have for me.

PLEASE...

Dear Lord, I really love KC.

Even with the situation we're in right now, my heart still goes out to him.

I do not wish to seek the easiest way out which is to give up. I WILL NOT agree to the devil or succumb to whatever circumstances we're in.

KC said to me, the one thing he would want to exchange with me is determination. Father, I beg of you please, will You grant him that determination to persevere on this relationship too?

PLEASE, I beg You please.